Dear Men,

I think I speak for most women out there when I say “We don’t want to see your delfie”. In case you’re unfamiliar with the term, a “Delfie” is a selfie of your dick. To set the record straight, the reason women might request a delfie is just flat out for collateral. That’s to say, in case you decide to go revenge Rambo and leak those nude pics she sent you that one time you were on vacation, you’ll think twice about it. After all, she has those really embarrassing snapshots of you taking a pic of your boner in the bathroom mirror. Trust me, unless we have requested one, there is no need to send one. It’s not to say that we don’t love your naked body, we just don’t want to be surprised by it via text like a jack in the box! Personally, I would prefer you sending me a pic of you dressed to the nines, looking hot AF in a suit carrying a puppy while you take the garbage out. If that sounds like too much of an effort for just one picture, then a nice sexy smile will do, along with a text of all the naughty things you might want to do later (is it hot in here?). Unfortunately, guys are clueless to this fact, so I took it upon myself to inform the men of the world or at least the ones who read this, that no girl wants to see your penis on a 5 inch screen. Want to raise your sex activity? Then take my advice and stop sending your borderline offensive delfies to that really cool girl you met at that party last weekend.


Concerned Citizen of the World